I saw this article…and have to say, WOW! It’s the perfect source material for a blogsite called “ZomBicurious”, right? The top 10 best zombie films of all time. As ridiculous as it is for me to refer to myself as a zombie aficionado, that’s just one of the things I am. I can’t get enough of zombies – good, bad, and wretchedly horrible. It’s the perfect stuff for a good laugh. And, forget about Team Jacob or Team Edward. In the Zombie universe there’s Team Fast and Team Slow and I’m somewhere in the middle.
If you want to look at Stylus Magazine’s Top Ten List, do so here: http://www.stylusmagazine.com/articles/movie_review/stylus-magazines-top-10-zombie-films-of-all-time.htm
While I agree with many of the choices they made, I have to say the order is a little off, in my opinion. Here’s my top ten list for not only zombie movies, but also zombie books. You gotta have both!
Top Ten Zombie Movies of All Time:
1. The Night of the Living Dead: It’s really kind of difficult to argue with the film that started the whole zombie craze. Yes, there have been many other zombie films that preceded this one, but not on the same level. George Romero’s first film is not his best, but it kick-started a sub-sect of the horror genre that would be repeated over, and over, and over again!
2. Dawn of the Dead: This is Romero’s finest film. And it works on every single level. From the campy Tom Savini make-up to the over-stylized gore (anyone remember that blood pressure machine?), to the uber-depressing ending. Plus, there’s a hefty social commentary running throughout. (A side note: Zach Snyder’s remake of “Dawn of the Dead”, which is really more of a reimagining, is excellent, and sadly would have come on the list had the list run past ten)
3. Shaun of the Dead: If Romero is the one that ignited the zombie genre, then Edgar Wright, Nick Frost, and Simon Pegg ignited the zom-com. Yes, Dan O’Bannon did it years before with the Return of the Living Dead films, which I think are pure hilarity, but they were nothing more than a blip on the map. Yes, I’m a Dan O’Bannon fanboy, so it’s very hard for me to substitute Team-Shaun here, but they did it. They did the same thing Romero did – create a genre that would be copied for years to come.
4. Dead Alive: Peter Jackson’s movie was once dubbed the “goriest film of all time”. It’s gory, no doubt about it. It’s also good to see a classic Peter Jackson film. I love Peter, but I’m sad that he’s not doing fun stuff like this any longer. Still there’s a lot to like in a movie that features campy comedy, a zombie virus spread from a vicious rat, and zombie sex that results in zombie baby. I challenge you not to laugh during the taking the zombie baby to the park scene.
5. Fido: “Fido” was barely seen by anyone, but it created an alternate 1950’s that had suffered the perils of the “zombie war”, rather than the Cold War tensions and threats from the Korean war. It’s a clever piece, and a near flawless film, and yet it’s nothing more than a boy-and-his-dog story. Billy Connelly has no lines as the title zombie, and the cast is filled with recognizable character actors but no real stars. It’s an exceptional film. If you’re one of the many that has not seen it, by all means rent it!
6. 28 Days Later: I realize that this is testing everything that I should be against. For starters, these are not even zombies. They’re infected with rage, and they are sort of brainless and only motivated by human flesh, but are they really zombies? No. And, they’re not the shuffling stiffs that have been represented in the previous 5 films. This, though, is where the genre began to change a bit. We began seeing fast zombies rather than the norm. There is a certain sense of dread that accompanies the fast, Russian-gymnast-esque zombies. Still, I will toss it a bone and say it’s a pretty cool flick.
7. Evil Dead 2: I should have this higher on the list, as I’m a Bruce Campbell fanboy. I’m also a friend, so I really should have this higher. Evil Dead 2 has not only zombies and, well, evil dead. It’s got a zombie deer head mounted on the wall. It’s also got one of the baddest ass zombie killers around – Ash, housewares. I’m still waiting to see if Ash can kick the ass of any other classic movie monsters.
8. Zombieland: This film kicked the zom-com into overdrive! Woody Harrelson is classic Woody. And the expectations should be kept relatively low. Why is it on the list, though? Well, the center of the humor of this film is in the repeating of the rules of a zombie movie. Everyone that’s seen a zombie flick knows the rules by heart already. But, this film makes a joke out of them and it works. There are countless rules. Having Bill Murray is great as well. There’s just so much to love about this film. It’s pretends to be nothing than what it is.
9. Zombi: This was made as a follow-up to Dawn Of the Dead. And it’s on the list for two reasons: 1.) Zombie versus Shark! And 2.) Conquistador zombies rising from the Earth!
10. Night of the Creeps: Fred Dekker was the man of the 80’s. Night of the Creeps and the great Tom Atkins made this horror-comedy work. Slugs get into your skin and turn you into flesh eating zombies. It’s great fun and, according to Troma alum, James Gunn, it inspired “Slither”. Finally this is released on Blu Ray, and the transfer is pretty gorgeous in all its 80’s gore.
5 Zombie Books You Must Read, if you like zombies, that is:
1. World War Z: Max Brooks mimicks Studs Terkel to great success here. It’s a book of accounts from the great Zombie War, and it’s excellent. Vivid detail from the recounts of the beginning in China to the United States Homefront. If you can listen to the audio book, you’ll be exceptionally impressed – Carl Reiner, Rob Reiner, Mark Hamill, Alan Aldo, Jurgen Prochnow, Henry Rollins, and others perform.
2. Breathers: Just finished this, and this is a thought-provoking look at the life of a zombie. It suffers from the same syndrome Shaun of the Dead does, in that it takes you on a hilarious journey, then reaches a weird plateau and is not sure where to go. Still, the end product is worth it.
3. Cell: Stephen King’s visceral look at the world turned to zombies courtesy of a signal pulsed through cellular phones is fast paced (very short for King) and visceral. Many argue that it’s not a King novel. I argue the opposite. In fact, after being disappointed by King, this was a nice return to some of his earlier horror fiction. I loved it.
4. Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince: The dementors marked a dark turn for the fantasy series. However, this book introduced us to the Inferi, which are the undead. I was tripping when I got to them. Zombies in a Harry Potter book? Awesome. This, too, marked a dark turn in the series, and I was elated to see them appear again in the final book of the series. Who knew Harry Potter and zombies went together?
5. The Rising: The book that really put Brian Keene on the map. It’s not well written. There are typos aplenty. Yet, the action is raw and in your face. The situations are horrifying. The dialogue is believable. And the zombies offer a new twist. It’s pretty awesome. If you like it you can always check out two others in that universe: City of the Dead and Dead Sea.
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Wikireality
More and more I'm convinced that we're plunging into the abyss. And, dammit, if that's the case, I'd rather not continue this chaotic Nestea Plunge. Rather, I'd just like to see the Etch-A-Sketch version - erase the thing and start over.
I'm not going to go off on a rant about all the things that irritate me these days: the fact that singers have resorted to horrid grammar to create hip rhymes ("it only matters who I is!" - really?), or the fact that crapfest movies win the box office over well thought out quasi-masterpieces, or that people like James Patterson and Dan Brown sit atop the bestsellers lists for rehashed books that are the literary merit of baby poop. I'll save those and many other topics for a later date.
What I'm fascinated with, though, is the Internet. More specifically, this wikireality.
Whether it's "The Matrix" or Tolkein's MiddleEarth, sci-fi and fantasy afficienados have been captivated by the idea of alternate realities. It's not surprising that the wet dreams of guys like Asimov and Dick would come to pass. Most of the conceptions of sci-fi have come to pass (granted, not quite in the same vein, but in concept. "Wall-E" may have hit the proverbial nail on the head, though, when they displayed what the cost for people would be, fat baby-like beings that are incapable of functioning for themselves...I shudder at the thought).
"The Sims" was the first zone. Second Life augmented that even further. But, now, the Internet seems to be an alternate reality of its own. And why the hell did this happen?
We've become a society that is incapable of original thought. I am talking about the majority, not the few of us who still do cultivate a little spark of creativity and have the capacity to imagine. This summer, for example, CNN received a tweet that Jeff Goldblum had died while climbing in New Zealand. The tweet came with a weblink. That was all the reporters at CNN needed to consider this valid information and a valid tip. So, they reported it as fact. This, of course, was a hoax, a fabricated lie, albeit doen very well. But what happened to the days when we looked at something and said, "Really? That doesn't seem right. Maybe I should investigate it a little." Nope. Nada. Say goodbye to those days. SMO (Social Media Outlets) have become the reality. If it didn't come across my facebook status page or my Twitter, then it damn sure didn't happen. (I'm judging CNN very harshly for not having an intern just pick up the phone and call Goldblum or a family member for a quote. I'm sure a call from CNN would garner a response from a B-list celebrity).
I can only assume that this is why so many people post so much (one as many as 42 times in an hour) online - if they don't post their day's activities, then they really have no value. I was eating lunch with someone who began talking about their insatiable desire to live on a farm. "I've never heard this from you before," I replied. They informed me that this was a new whim, created from their love of Farmville, a facebook game. Yeah, and courtesy of Mafia, I'm sure you'll want to live like Tony Soprano next.
I've eaten lunch with people, spoken to them on the phone, seen them in passing, and you'd think that if I were getting engaged they would know about this. An engagement isn't something that pops up out of the blue, randomly. It's something that's savored, salivated over, and enjoyed. You talk it up in passing. You mention it to your friends. You milk it for every ounce it's worth (which, with inflation factored in, is quite a lot more than it was in 1950). Yet, I change my status to "engaged" on facebook and the world seems come alive.
Within 30 minutes I'd received 4 text messages and 2 phone calls (don't even get me started on texting). By the hour mark, I'd received 3 facebook messages and 2 emails. It's fascinating. Of course, I'd respond with, "wouldn't I have told you?" And, people aren't sure what to respond to that with. Interesting.
Nobody bothered to think. Eric's engaged? That's odd. Very, very odd. Nobody bothered to investigate (and I'm talking elementary...as in elementary education, not "elementary by dear Watson"). He's engaged to Christy Leigh? She's in California? How did that happen? How did they meet? When was he spending any amoutn of time in California? Nobody bothered to ration it out. That's impossible! I call shenanigans!
Christy is a fan. I like Christy. She gave me her dowry (which is a funny story involving an inheritance, postal exchange, and Jose Canseco...but it's a story for a different time). And we love each other, as much as two people can over the Internet. She's a good sport. And, dammit, I have tremendous respect for her. But we've never once physically met.
If I were engaged, wouldn't I have met, mentioned, or made-merry with her?
Nope. People see "engaged" as the relationship status and automatically assume that that's what happened.
Am I trying to "Punk" anyone? Not in the least. I would say that this is a sociological experiment.
In interesting news, I received more attention to this status than I have to any mention of my book. Christy has received more attention on this status than she did on her art. Fascinating.
It's food for thought, kids. I know I may have shattered the glass dome that we're all trapped in a bit. Sure, I frayed the thin veil. But, c'mon. We're steps away from losing the ability to think and ration for ourselves. Think about that today...oh wait, thoughlessness is contagion. Think about that today, if you still think.
Signing off...
I'm not going to go off on a rant about all the things that irritate me these days: the fact that singers have resorted to horrid grammar to create hip rhymes ("it only matters who I is!" - really?), or the fact that crapfest movies win the box office over well thought out quasi-masterpieces, or that people like James Patterson and Dan Brown sit atop the bestsellers lists for rehashed books that are the literary merit of baby poop. I'll save those and many other topics for a later date.
What I'm fascinated with, though, is the Internet. More specifically, this wikireality.
Whether it's "The Matrix" or Tolkein's MiddleEarth, sci-fi and fantasy afficienados have been captivated by the idea of alternate realities. It's not surprising that the wet dreams of guys like Asimov and Dick would come to pass. Most of the conceptions of sci-fi have come to pass (granted, not quite in the same vein, but in concept. "Wall-E" may have hit the proverbial nail on the head, though, when they displayed what the cost for people would be, fat baby-like beings that are incapable of functioning for themselves...I shudder at the thought).
"The Sims" was the first zone. Second Life augmented that even further. But, now, the Internet seems to be an alternate reality of its own. And why the hell did this happen?
We've become a society that is incapable of original thought. I am talking about the majority, not the few of us who still do cultivate a little spark of creativity and have the capacity to imagine. This summer, for example, CNN received a tweet that Jeff Goldblum had died while climbing in New Zealand. The tweet came with a weblink. That was all the reporters at CNN needed to consider this valid information and a valid tip. So, they reported it as fact. This, of course, was a hoax, a fabricated lie, albeit doen very well. But what happened to the days when we looked at something and said, "Really? That doesn't seem right. Maybe I should investigate it a little." Nope. Nada. Say goodbye to those days. SMO (Social Media Outlets) have become the reality. If it didn't come across my facebook status page or my Twitter, then it damn sure didn't happen. (I'm judging CNN very harshly for not having an intern just pick up the phone and call Goldblum or a family member for a quote. I'm sure a call from CNN would garner a response from a B-list celebrity).
I can only assume that this is why so many people post so much (one as many as 42 times in an hour) online - if they don't post their day's activities, then they really have no value. I was eating lunch with someone who began talking about their insatiable desire to live on a farm. "I've never heard this from you before," I replied. They informed me that this was a new whim, created from their love of Farmville, a facebook game. Yeah, and courtesy of Mafia, I'm sure you'll want to live like Tony Soprano next.
I've eaten lunch with people, spoken to them on the phone, seen them in passing, and you'd think that if I were getting engaged they would know about this. An engagement isn't something that pops up out of the blue, randomly. It's something that's savored, salivated over, and enjoyed. You talk it up in passing. You mention it to your friends. You milk it for every ounce it's worth (which, with inflation factored in, is quite a lot more than it was in 1950). Yet, I change my status to "engaged" on facebook and the world seems come alive.
Within 30 minutes I'd received 4 text messages and 2 phone calls (don't even get me started on texting). By the hour mark, I'd received 3 facebook messages and 2 emails. It's fascinating. Of course, I'd respond with, "wouldn't I have told you?" And, people aren't sure what to respond to that with. Interesting.
Nobody bothered to think. Eric's engaged? That's odd. Very, very odd. Nobody bothered to investigate (and I'm talking elementary...as in elementary education, not "elementary by dear Watson"). He's engaged to Christy Leigh? She's in California? How did that happen? How did they meet? When was he spending any amoutn of time in California? Nobody bothered to ration it out. That's impossible! I call shenanigans!
Christy is a fan. I like Christy. She gave me her dowry (which is a funny story involving an inheritance, postal exchange, and Jose Canseco...but it's a story for a different time). And we love each other, as much as two people can over the Internet. She's a good sport. And, dammit, I have tremendous respect for her. But we've never once physically met.
If I were engaged, wouldn't I have met, mentioned, or made-merry with her?
Nope. People see "engaged" as the relationship status and automatically assume that that's what happened.
Am I trying to "Punk" anyone? Not in the least. I would say that this is a sociological experiment.
In interesting news, I received more attention to this status than I have to any mention of my book. Christy has received more attention on this status than she did on her art. Fascinating.
It's food for thought, kids. I know I may have shattered the glass dome that we're all trapped in a bit. Sure, I frayed the thin veil. But, c'mon. We're steps away from losing the ability to think and ration for ourselves. Think about that today...oh wait, thoughlessness is contagion. Think about that today, if you still think.
Signing off...
Friday, February 12, 2010
Naked Metamorphosis for Breast Cancer
My friend Jane, in Baltimore, recently found out that she has breast cancer. I say recently, but the truth is, she's known for a bit. As she says, "Happy Holidays". I've been taking a little time to accept this reality for a variety of reasons: 1.) I'm not in Baltimore and feel helpless that I cannot offer support, and 2.) because, I've always seen Jane as the epitome of strength and when I imagine this all I see is frailty. Wow! Put a little distance on it and you realize...THIS is the epitome of strength. Her and her husband, David, have it in spades, man. Te read about her journey thus far: http://janesposse.blogspost.com
I also decided that there is a way I can help. Maybe not her specifically, but in a way. That's why, I've decided that I'm going to make a donation to Susan G. Komen the first week of March. For every copy of "Naked Metamorphosis" that is sold, I'm donating 50%. I'll post a picture of the check/Paypal screen when I do, so that you know I'm not full of it. After all, there are crazy people out there, jumping up and down claiming to be charitable, but they're not. I hate them. We hate them.
I've also upped the ante a little. If...and only if...I can make this puppy sell and create a generous donation to Susan G. in the remaining days of February, well, I'm going to shave my locks. My hair's not long by any stretch, but those that know me know I love my hair. Love. It. So, to lose it would be a dear price...well, for me.
So, to recap:
I also decided that there is a way I can help. Maybe not her specifically, but in a way. That's why, I've decided that I'm going to make a donation to Susan G. Komen the first week of March. For every copy of "Naked Metamorphosis" that is sold, I'm donating 50%. I'll post a picture of the check/Paypal screen when I do, so that you know I'm not full of it. After all, there are crazy people out there, jumping up and down claiming to be charitable, but they're not. I hate them. We hate them.
I've also upped the ante a little. If...and only if...I can make this puppy sell and create a generous donation to Susan G. in the remaining days of February, well, I'm going to shave my locks. My hair's not long by any stretch, but those that know me know I love my hair. Love. It. So, to lose it would be a dear price...well, for me.
So, to recap:
- Get a good read...one that you'll enjoy (and it's got my personal email in it so you can talk to me electronically or send me Viagra spam);
- Do it for a good cause (maybe not the BEST cause, but a cause nonetheless).
- Punish me...wait? What?
Thank you for all your support....http://www.amazon.com/Naked-Metamorphosis-Eric-Mays/dp/1933929901/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1265979636&sr=8-1-spell
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Valentine's Day Gifts
Yes, it's the time of year when everyone has love in their very googly eyes. Yes, it's the time of year when diamond commercials are hocking their wares with the spin that if you don't treat your beloved to a diamond, then you're not really "in love". Ugh, I say, and gag me with Alpo.
Whether it's your holiday or not - I'm not getting into the repugnancy of this cherished and beloved holiday; it's neither the time nor the place - it's coming like a freight train from hell, and there's not a whole lot you can do about it. So, I, the authorguy who loathes V-Day (ironically, initialled VD), is offering a holiday treat for you and your loved one(s).
Unfortunately it's only for the Richmonders. Sorry to all my fans from around the globe. Of course, I guess you could play...but the prizes are in Richmond.
First and foremost, I think you should give the gift of books. I always have subscribed to this theory and always will. Books are one of the best gifts to give and receive. Incidentally, I have a little book out that would make a wonderful gift for yourself or someone you love. It's called "Naked Metamorphosis", and despite the word "naked" in the title, it's not kinky. It is highbrow humor that has been called witty and whimsical, though.
Speaking of this little gem, it's 9.95 at Amazon and can be added to your cart here: http://www.amazon.com/Naked-Metamorphosis-Eric-Mays/dp/1933929901/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1265720130&sr=8-1. Now how can this get any better? Well, if you'd like a little extra oomph to your Valentine's Day offerings, here's what I'll do. The first person to order and email me their confirmation number - I don't want your credit card info, just a sign that you ordered it - to ericm@witty.com, will receive a V-Day package:
Whether it's your holiday or not - I'm not getting into the repugnancy of this cherished and beloved holiday; it's neither the time nor the place - it's coming like a freight train from hell, and there's not a whole lot you can do about it. So, I, the authorguy who loathes V-Day (ironically, initialled VD), is offering a holiday treat for you and your loved one(s).
Unfortunately it's only for the Richmonders. Sorry to all my fans from around the globe. Of course, I guess you could play...but the prizes are in Richmond.
First and foremost, I think you should give the gift of books. I always have subscribed to this theory and always will. Books are one of the best gifts to give and receive. Incidentally, I have a little book out that would make a wonderful gift for yourself or someone you love. It's called "Naked Metamorphosis", and despite the word "naked" in the title, it's not kinky. It is highbrow humor that has been called witty and whimsical, though.
Speaking of this little gem, it's 9.95 at Amazon and can be added to your cart here: http://www.amazon.com/Naked-Metamorphosis-Eric-Mays/dp/1933929901/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1265720130&sr=8-1. Now how can this get any better? Well, if you'd like a little extra oomph to your Valentine's Day offerings, here's what I'll do. The first person to order and email me their confirmation number - I don't want your credit card info, just a sign that you ordered it - to ericm@witty.com, will receive a V-Day package:
- A 1 night stay for 2 at the brand new Short Pump Hilton
- A $25 gift certificate at the Aura Day Spa (located in the Short Pump Hilton)
- And another goodie that I'll mention later...but it's a doozy.
Don't fret. If you're the second in line to email me your confirmation ID, I'll give you a $25 gift certificate to the Aura Day Spa.
So what are you waiting for? I'm giving you free Valentine's goodies all in exchange for a $10 book. Go...order...win!
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